THE JOYS OF LAUNDRY

With the amount of laundry that I require to get done each week, I could personally sustain a single laundry facility with my patronage. I am a mess. I spill things on myself with such frequency that my wedding, and the idea of having to sport a white gown all day, inspired a tremendous amount of anxiety in anticipation of the variety of food and drink that would pass before my glinty white confection. I digress....
As a result of my innumerable accidents, I have gathered together a large recipe file of cure - alls for a wide variety of stains. Here are a few laundry maladies (and believe me I have personally experienced all of these), to which I have either developed or acquired a remedy;

INK STAINS
First and foremost: do not put your article in the the dryer until the stain is out or you have given up and conceded to the fact that you must dye your clothing item black.

Oxyclean & Rubbing Alcohol, applied in circular scrubbing motions. Make sure that there is a disposable rag underneath the stain to absorb penetrating ink. Hairspray also works as does nail polish remover. Keep in mind that if the item tends to bleed, the alcohol will also cause bleeding. Therefore, after focusing on the stain, soak the entire garment in rubbing alcohol to even out any color fading.

RED WINE
I have seen so many people treat red wine with hot water and it makes me want to cringe! Red wine should be treated like blood or ketchup: COLD WATER. Also, I have been told to treat red wine stains with white wine, but unless you want to smell like a raging alcoholic, here is a tried and true alternative that has never failed me:

Equal parts dishsoap and hydrogen peroxide, again rubbed in a circular fashion building inward to the center of the stain with a disposable cloth on the underside of the stain. For those of you who see peroxide and think bleach, fear not, hydrogen peroxide doesn't strip color.

GREASE
Contrary to popular belief, seltzer is very rarely a reliable source of stain relief. Your better off using it for an upset stomach. Here is the best recipe for cutting through oil in a garment, even if it has been run through a drying cycle:

Detergent (Zout is even better), Iodized Salt, and the hottest water your garment can handle.

Again, you will need a disposable towel underneath. I highly recommend allowing your garment to sit with salt on the stain, overnight.

WHITENING
Bleach should never be your automatic go to for whitening clothing or bedding. Not only does bleach break down fabric over time, the chemicals in bleach react with body persperation, causing that annoying yellowing. Here are some fantastic, old school remedies that you can add directly to the washer along with your detergent:

lemon juice (think about it as a natural bleach)- you must use real fresh lemon juice
laundry bluing (Mrs. Stewart's for example) - don't be afraid of the saturated color, its best for counteracting yellowing in whites.
If you have space and time, take your whites and place them in a simmering (not boiling) bath of hot water over the stove with fresh lemon juice.

I hope that these tips will give your fabrics an extended life. They certainly have acted as the defibrilators to my clothes and upholstery after many a nasty spill.